Uremia Sucks!

Okay, not a pretty title...but not a pretty subject, either, and somehow "uremia doesn't feel good" or "uremia is the pits" just didn't cut it. By definition, uremia is the accumulation in the blood of constituents normally eliminated in the urine that produces a toxic condition and usually occurs in severe kidney disease. When the kidneys aren't functioning at a normal level, uremia can set in and it makes you feel very tired and physically uncomfortable.

Full blown kidney disease to the point of kidney failure is a rather perplexing condition. Some days, I wake up feeling pretty good, actually, and wonder why it is I am in line for a surgical procedure to replace a major organ. Other days, I am painfully reminded that my quality of life is being severely compromised.

Today, is one of those days that I feel stone cold sick. Following a night of insomnia, and a mere two hours of sleep, my body just can't seem to get in gear. I feel totally drained of energy. An undercurrent of nausea and a dull headache don't help. I'm also experiencing more body aches than I am accustomed to, in particular some strange, bee sting-like sensations that come and go in my legs. I've also noticed a succession of tiny blood vessels have burst near the surface of the skin on my hands...really icky!

It's very frustrating to have so much I want to do and so little stamina. It's also frustrating that I don't know how long it will be before I can take more positive measures to get my health going in a better direction. I'm only at the very beginning of the transplant process...and I am one of many who need such a procedure and will possibly have to wait a long time for my turn of the wheel to come up for a donor kidney, should my daughter not prove to be a match.

There are so many uncertainties at this point in time, and it's a battle to not let fear and worry get the better of you. Maintaining a positive attitude is of paramount importance, and it's a daily goal just to do the best I can with whatever I'm faced with on that particular day.

Family and friends help so much to keep me smiling and looking on the bright side through this process. I feel a deep and continual sense of gratitude for their love and support.

For any one who chances to come across my blog who's facing similar trials, my thoughts are with you. Keep up the good fight :)