Battle Weary

It seems altogether fitting that we use military references and jargon to describe our own physical health challenges. The experience of kidney failure and uremia prior to receiving a transplant was draining, tiresome, and scary. Be as they were, these symptoms allowed me to fully acknowledge the dire need for surgery.

I had a most powerful ally going into surgery - my spit-fire, super healthy and strong daughter, a life saving ally who donated her own kidney so that I could continue on. Both of us successfully made it through our surgical experience ... Desirae's wounds healing quickly, allowing her to be back on her feet within weeks. With a healthy kidney now at full function in my body, I was equipped with the reinforcement needed to continue on with the good fight to better health. Desirae and I were further reinforced by her boyfriend and my husband, invaluable partners to our success.

My campaign to better health has been long and slow and not free of it's own pitfalls and backslides. Currently, I'm dealing with yet another UTI, very common in transplant patients. This time around, just a little over a month since the last UTI, I'm on a higher dose of antibiotic to combat the infection. The very medication that knocks out the infection, is so strong in and of itself that it weakens the body and leaves one feeling fatigued and battle worn. Today, when I told him how I felt, Kevin answered that the only thing I could do was to "soldier on," and, he's so right. When the going gets tough, the tough get going - and keep marching on.

Years ago, my Mother accompanied me to the hospital when I underwent surgery to remove a sinus cyst. The surgery was dangerous because of the location of the cyst, very close to the brain. It's always scary to be informed of the risks prior to any surgery, but the benefits of a successful procedure are generally worth the potential risk. A decision is made to go ahead and keep the faith, with hope that the end result is successful. This surgery resulted in the desired outcome - the cyst successfully removed, the pain and swelling in my face gone, and the ability to breathe made easy again. After I came out of recovery and was wheeled out to the waiting room, where my Mom patiently waited, I'll never forget what she said. With a relieved look on her face and a twinkle in her eye, she exclaimed happily, "There's my little Spartan!" Her comment made me laugh, but I knew it was a huge compliment coming from my Mother who had survived more than her own share of surgeries and medical issues including bone tuberculosis as a child, multiple stomach surgeries, and breast cancer as an older woman. She was a medical veteran who'd earned all the honors one could hold as a victorious hero of many a long, hard fought battle.

My Mother's been my inspiration and guardian angel through my own long drawn out medical battles. I grew up watching her fight, conquer, and thrive. Despite major physical illness and handicap, she powered on, living life to the fullest and never giving in to the struggles. She reached 81 years of age, truly miraculous for the harrowing ordeals she faced. Through her example, I learned one must persevere despite hardship. No matter how exhausting the battles or how long the road traveled may be, it's worth any struggle for the rewards of enjoying life are so many.

Battle weary from yet another fight I may be, but, it's time to put any complaint aside, be ever thankful to be here, and soldier on!