HAPPY Halloween!!!

Plugging Along

Last week we received some great news. After her test results came in, it was determined that, so far, my daughter is a perfect match for me as a potential kidney donor. Her blood type and all 6 antigens are identical to mine. She still has some tests to get through to see if all is well for her to be able to donate her kidney...but the first major question was finally answered and the green light results gave us all a boost.

This week has been a practice of patience. Over and over, I've had to call and remind doctors offices to fax medical results to Johns Hopkins Hospital. I even had difficulty getting a necessary doctor's appointment scheduled with my internist, because, in the receptionist's words, "my case was getting too complicated." I finally called my physician's nurse directly, and she scheduled my appointment for today. My doctor, who I've known for years, and I shared a laugh over the fact that if his receptionist told all his patients that they couldn't make appointments with him because their medical issues were "getting too complicated," it kind of defeated his purpose in being there. I'm not so sure his approach with his receptionist, after speaking with me, will be as light hearted and fun.

While at the doctor's office, I got a pneumonia vaccination and was referred on to a cardiologist. I need a variety of cardiac tests to assure that my heart is strong enough to withstand surgery and the receipt of a new kidney. Also scheduled is a CT abdominal scan that will provide closer examination of the cysts on my kidneys to rule out the possibility of malignancies. The surgery can not go forward if the cysts are cancerous.

I have never enjoyed going to the doctor or getting medical tests, I don't know of too many people who do, but after all I've already been through in that regard this year alone, I'm getting used to it and used to waiting lengthy periods for simple tests. I'm finding that I'm taking things in stride better than I thought I would at the beginning of this process on the road to getting a new kidney. The road may be long, but I just keep plugging along. It's stop and go and sometimes bumpy, but encouraging news like we received from my daughter last week helps make the ride a lot easier. We hope the road ahead will offer up a lot more green lights!

True Grit

Bush Honeysuckle

My topic for pondering and discussion today is determination. Going with the flow, even when the waters are rough. Making the best of a bad situation...and maybe even finding something pretty good about your new circumstances.

The inspiration for today's blog came in the form of a most curious insect - a walking stick. Few creatures have been better named. The walking stick looks exactly like it's name - it's a living, mobile twig!

Walking Stick Posing for the Camera

Today, I was doing a bit of garden clean-up. My cone flowers needed to be trimmed back and the plastic trellis in front of them stored for the winter. As I lifted the trellis from its spot in front of the cone flowers, I found the above pictured walking stick clinging to the back side. I had upset his refuge and hiding place and felt compelled to find another place to drop him off since the trellis was going into the shed - no place for a walking stick of the insect type.

The fragile looking walking stick teetered nervously on my hand, but waited until I found a small oak tree to scurry off. I was thinking I should try to get a photo of this stick-like camouflage expert, but had other garden chores to tend to at the time. The walking stick accepted his new perch with little fuss. I was sure by the time I was finished with my outdoor activities he would be long gone.

Two hours later, I returned to the little oak tree and there he was! Not only was the walking stick still amongst the oak leaves, he willingly posed for photo after photo, until I was satisfied that I had gotten at least one shot that would show off his best attributes. He'd had quite a day - being discovered by a giant human and being transported to a new location by said human...and then, after having found the new digs not so bad and starting to unwind, being rediscovered and photographed in them - definitely displaying true grit, going with the flow, and making the best of what had to have been quite an unsettling experience! I guess we all could pick up some pointers from such a brave, adaptable little dude!

I just love quotes. The quote that follows seemed a very fitting end to this blog. It made me chuckle, too. It was written by a gentleman by the name of Robert W. Service. I have no idea who he is or was, but I would imagine this guy knew a thing or two about determination, too :)

It's the plugging away that will win you the day

So don't be a piker old pard!

Just draw on your grit; it's so easy to quit -

It's the keeping your chin up that's hard.

Chestnut Oaks

This Day

"Your daily life is your temple and your religion." - Kahlil Gibran


I thought I would start this blog off with the simple, but profound words of Kahil Gibran, one of my favorite philosophers. This day for me started as remotely as can be from anything resembling a temple or religion in my book. I was feeling so nauseus and uncomfortable that I decided to scrap my planned agenda and rework it in a more gentle fashion. I started with a nap with the cats...yes...I got up and then took a nap! Now, for the cats, this was the absolute pinnacle of ways to start the day. They just love to huddle in bed with me, the longer, the better. So, it was nice to see I was making my furry companions so happy.

The extra rest helped me, too. After some chicken noodle soup and soda crackers for lunch, I had enough get up and go to get outside and stack the wood Kevin chopped over the weekend. We're getting a good head start on our wood pile!

That little bit of exercise energized me further to take a walk through the woods. With camera in hand , I set out. After making a circuit around the cabin, taking in the beauty of the colorful, autumn leaves, I headed over to the lot next door, tresspassing into our neighbor's yard which affords a great view of the farm across the street from us. The farm valley below and mountains beyond is so scenic!

In the open field of my lookout, there is a patch of vibrantly colored "Butter and Eggs" flowers. They've been flowering since early summer.

The natural beauty all around me elevated my day from ho-hum to heavenly. As I slowly retraced my steps to our cabin, I felt renewed, happy, and at peace. This day was a good day afterall.

Home Sweet Home

Happiness is ...

A warm kitty to cuddle

Jasper is an amazing cat. She seems to sense when I am sick or feeling bad and does her best to remedy the situation. Years ago, when I was suffering from pneumonia, she was never far from my bedside, and usually laying right on top of my chest like a mother hen, keeping watch over me and keeping me warm. Today was a tough one for me symptom wise, and there was Jasper at the ready to offer the comfort and closeness that has endeared her to me and created such a close bond. It truly is a gift to love and be loved in return by an animal!

Jasper and her sister Pacey have brought immeasurable happiness to our lives. Pacey adores Kevin, and he has become her "chosen one." Everyday, she curls up in his lap as he watches television, the most content look on her face. She also likes to visit him when he's at work in his study, often curling up on the table beside his computer, keeping an eye on his every move.

Even though there are many days here of late that are physically uncomfortable, I continue to find happiness in simple endeavors at home in our peaceful cabin. It's been nice to have some down time to devote to creative activities. I found a scrapbook at a local yard sale and have begun to fill it with collages. I'd almost forgotten how fun it can be to create hodgepodge collections of magazine photos and clippings.

My latest collage creation

Jasper and Pacey even inspire my collaging :) I was able to find photographs that resemble each of them to include in the montage.

Happiness truly is the simple inspirations that enter our life and touch our world with a bit of magic all their own. Be it a beautiful wildflower, a flitting butterfly, or the glow of a campfire or candle light ... there is much to be noticed , much to be thankful for, and much that brings happiness.

Fall Free Form

Brilliantly colored maple leaves

The temperatures are getting chillier and the leaf colors are definitely starting to pop. Soon, we will be surrounded by the vibrant reds, golds, oranges, and browns here at the cabin. The tall green pines compliment the hardwoods' colors with their evergreen shades. It's an especially beautiful time of year.

Fall is also a time for contemplation. The seasonal change lends itself to reflecting on one's place in the world, first looking within and then focusing outward on the bigger picture, recognizing that, though each of us is but a tiny speck in the cosmos, we are all interconnected parts of the natural world. Though each of us are unique individuals, we are never alone in the world. The natural beauty of color and light that surrounds us in fall has a spiritual essence all it's own. It's an uplifting and invigorating time of year.

Through the years, I've enjoyed trying my hand at all sorts of poetry. Especially fun is Haiku ... a simple, but sensorially evocative or emotionally touching string of words ... some following a distinct pattern of lines and syllables and some more free form in style.

To celebrate the season, I created a couple of free form Haikus to share:

Leaves twirl

On a chill breeze

Autumn kaleidoscope.

Over head

Crescendo fades

Geese fly south.

Enjoy the beauty of the autumn season!

Our woods as the sun sets.

The Wait Continues

Even though things are progressing as they should, the process for finding out when I will get a kidney transplant feels agonizingly slow.

Last week, Kevin and I went to Johns Hopkins Hospital to attend the long awaited initial transplant evaluation meeting. Over a five hour period, we met with a nurse coordinator, nephrologist, dietitian, social worker, financial advisor, and the transplant surgeon. It was a long, intense day, culminating with a "blood letting." I was required to go to the Hopkins lab and give more blood than I ever had at one sitting! Fortunately, Kevin and I had eaten the sandwiches I'd packed just before I went to the lab to get my blood drawn. Otherwise, I fear I would have passed out!

We were told at this initial consultation that my case would go before a review committee for a final decision regarding my transplant. All of the medical experts we saw agreed a transplant was in order and the sooner the better. Now, it's a matter of waiting to see what further tests I need to undergo prior to surgery, determining whether my daughter is a match, and, if so, scheduling a date for surgery. We are hoping that all will go well and that the transplant can be scheduled before the end of the year.

Immediately after the evaluation meeting, I felt extremely nervous. Even though it was great to finally meet with the Hopkins staff and get a lot of our questions answered, this meeting brought it all home that the transplant is really going to happen...and soon. How soon, we still have to wait and see.

We still have matters of insurance to work through and must choose our provider carefully. That's one of the scariest parts. We have to be really careful of the choice we make to assure adequate coverage not only for the transplant surgery, but for the follow-up aftercare. After the surgery, I will be required to take a whole battery of medications for life to prevent rejection and infection, and, for the first year afterwards, visits to the doctors office will be a frequent occurrence.

My daughter went for her initial blood and tissue tests yesterday. In a couple of weeks, we should know whether or not she can continue to be considered for donation for me. So, once again, we anxiously await results that will determine our next moves in this process.

Desirae and I had the chance to talk a bit more about our joint effort in this process this past weekend when she came down from Massachusetts for a visit. She is facing this with a sense of calm and level headedness and is so supportive of me. It is of great comfort to have such a loving daughter who is willing to be there and give so much. And Kevin has been everything I could ever ask for, too - loving, supportive, and always there by my side. Even though my nerves are a bit frayed, I feel confident in what will be.

So, for now, we continue to wait...

Apples, Animals, and Asian Food

Our neighboring apple orchard

It was a picture perfect fall weekend. After picking Desi up from the airport on Friday night, we were in a whirlwind of activity. On Saturday, we toured our local zoo...always a fun thing to do, but especially fun when feeding the resident wildlife. Desi and I purchased a cup of the zoo's special diet pellets and found plenty of eager eaters!

Feeding the colorful koi and carp

We saw llamas, jaguars, tigers, giant tortoises, monkeys, and a whole slew of tropical birds on our zoo visit. It was exciting to walk the wooded zoo trails and discover what was awaiting us around each bend. Though small, our local zoo is a wonderful place to see wildlife up close. The crowds are minimal and the scenery is as pretty and diverse as the animals within.

Desirae waiting to see the tropical parrots!

Des has always had a special way with parrots. They seem as intrigued with her as the other way around. Not only do they chatter to her, but they mimic her when she bobs back and forth from side to side. It's a riot!

After our zoo trip, we went to the orchard market where Desirae helped pick the perfect pumpkin from the giant "pumpkin pyramid." The pumpkin will stay a pumpkin until the end of the month when it will be transformed into a Halloween Jack-o-Lantern, it's face glowing brightly in the dark.

The weekend went by in a flash. Desirae attended a friend's wedding reception on Saturday night, and, then, after a day of visiting on Sunday with Kevin and me, followed by a scrumptious meal at an Asian restaurant in town, it was time to head back to the airport so Desi could catch her evening flight to Boston.

My fortune cookie from the restaurant read, "You are busy but happy." - Yup, I'd say so :)